its so hard

its so hard making things go right.
especially when the other half of the stake is hard to predict.

ps: why is everyone so busy. i am busy too. busy with trying to be busy

don't define it.

i think for the past few weeks, i failed to acknowledge it
on purpose.
but now, i think i am ready for it, once again.
this time, i fell deeper, sinking an inch deeper everyday.
yes, its him.

don't ask me why and how.
cause you cannot define
its impossible.
you cannot define love neither can you explain it.
if your love can be define or explain,
its not love.

i am very unsure about things in life
but for some reason,
i am very sure about you.
ever since i said those words
"i will wait"
i know i am very very sure about it.

if i can't get you
what am i suppose to do?
i think i will be super lost then.

wk said to me,
2 years isn't long, neither is it short.
alot of things can happen in that 2 years
are you sure about it?

yes. hack sure.
if he is willing.
its been 4 yrs, another 2 yrs doesn't make any difference
only this time,
i want it to be "returned"

ps: Life may be hard at times, but you only live it once. So make the best out of it. This time, i want to make it happen.

fate.

like what wei kiat said,
leave everything for fate to decide.

but its hard.
sometimes,
you feel like having control over things
let them be the way you wish it was.
usually it doesn't work that way.
never defy nature, leave it to fate.
if not things will get messy
and in the end,
you will be at the loosing end,
terribly hurt.

hais.

ps: getting fat.

haiya.

i lost my ez-link card which has my ugly face on it.
damn. now the whole world knows how ugly i look le... muhaha

watched pirates of the caribbean ystd night
not bad la.
but a bit confusing.
apparently, someone watchd until fall aslp.
haha. too tired ba.

now i am waiting for my favourite movie, HARRY POTTER!
hehe... cannot wait...

i am so hyper today.
i was awake for almost the whole night
reached home about 2 plus in the morning
den when to bed at 3 lidat and lay there till 5am before i finally slept
and guess wad
i woke at 9am this morning!
and there still no trace of sleepiness in me.
hoho... this is so unusual.

graduation.

graduation ceremonies are boring
with lots of long speeches by this and that VIP.
gosh!

anyway there isn't much pictures oso.


mr aszad. my pal during attachment.


my mum

i don't know why adults are making a fuss about taking photos. anyway its just diploma. no big deal. will post somemore when i receive from my friends.

still there

after all these years,
i have realise that i am still walking in this same maze as i have walk into 3 years ago.
its been so long already and i have neither come out of it happily nor given up walking out of it. sometimes i wonder, why am i turning myself into such a pathetic person for him?
as if he would reciprocate them.
if he would, i would not mind if it takes 10yrs to walk out of that maze with victory
but its obvious that i would not happen that way.
why have i ended in such a pathetic state? WHY?!
i hate myself for this,
i have lost all faith and hope in him.
its time i give up totally.
there will be no silver lining.

problems everywhere

everyone around me is having problems. including myself.

i think its a phase everyone has to go through when they are switching to a new life, a new environment, and a new beginning.

there is so many things to worry. will i do well in uni? i must do well.
will i grow fat tommorrow? it seems like i have eaten alot today.
why is life so difficult for me?
why did i like someone so difficult to like? among all the ppl, why him?
and what should i do? move on and give up or what?

it seems like there is so much uncertainty, problems and fears.
hais...

ps: may, you will pull through de. i know you can, cause you been through so much to reach here. so this time round, you can do it de.

想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
为爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道

funny!

my mum told me a joke today;

if farmer A sells fruits and vegetables
and farmer B sells poultry
what does farmer C sells?

give it a guess
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
give up?
.
.
.
.
.
medicine. pharmacy (farmer c).

muhahaaa.

ps: was looking at harry potter website and ran across daniel raddcliffe photos. he really change alot! from a very cute boy to a super macho and handsome young man. muahaha...


his first film.


latest film.

how.

sometimes things he said makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time.

may: "he want to be monk arhs?"
me: "then i go be nun!"

muhahahaha....

ps: the next thing that will be extinct after the dodo bird will be him.

super pissed off.

i am 20 this year
stop treating me like a baby.
damn it.
I AM JUST SO PISSED! how i wish i could just walk out of this house!

ps: just last week i was over the moon. now, i wish i could just drop dead.

Movies and more movies

there will loads of new and blockbuster movies of the year screening from may to july.

1. Spiderman 3 (visit site)

i think, it is the best Spiderman series.




Toby Maguire as Peter Parker/Spiderman


Kristen Dunst as Mary Jane Watson

2. Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (visit site)




Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow


Keira Knightley as Elizabeth Swann


Orlando Bloom as Will Turner


Chouw Yun Fat as Captain Siao Feng



Geoffrey Rush as Captain Hector Barbossa

3. Shrek 3 (visit site)

i love shrek!





is he gonna be king of Far Far Away Kingdom?

4. Fanastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (visit site)



5. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (visit site)

follwing the sequel of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire



the Order of the Phoenix will be out in 12 July 2007
this is a die die die must watch film of the year for me! i cannot wait!




the rebellion begins

Spiderman 3

its a really super nice show!
but why must that harry (or was it henry) die?
aiyo...
anyway, it was the best spiderman series ever.

and i die die will go watch Pirates of Caribbean: At Worlds End.
oh, Chow Yun Fat is the pirate from.. ah hem... Singapore
also there is a new movie "Blades of Glory" which i find it funny.

ps: blogger is finally OK! will post pic tomorrow. bought $75 worth of stuff just today. oh god... i will be so damn broke.

anyway, will you be there when i need you? will what i wish for happen? will it ever happen? "i don't think so. it shall be just like this. FRIENDS."

Movies!

i am going to watch spiderman 3 today!

Pirates of Caribbean is coming!

this wasn't meant to be

if it was meant to be
i would have happen that time
why wait till now.

such things will never happen
on me.

ps: i hate blogger. now my skin has prob too

活过 - 阿杜

一条路有多少分岔口
走呀走就不能再回头
痛哭过因为执着
依依不舍那又如何

一棵树长多高才足够
风雨中有过多少惶恐
叶凋落也曾结果
花开花谢只为活过

感动的最初曾经的幸福
尽管我苦苦的追逐
再也找不回来时路

所谓的永久放下无助换自由
回忆埋在心最深处
种一颗会发芽的祝福

ps: May, you really think too much le. Such things will never happen. At least it will never be me. I am not so lucky.

mixed up

when old memories are being revived,
so are the feelings.
its weird.
you know these old feelings have died
but you can feel them lingering around.
it shall be fine after sometime.
i hope so.

things shall be fine, as time pass.

ps: blogger has some serious problems.

more pics.

more pictures from ystd night.
thanks to my beloved darling.. may (muhaha)


uncle peh.


"is the carrot cake nice?"


figure that out. looks familiar huh


finding your car is so easy when you have your name stick to the windows


the sign says it all


i look so dead and she is so hyper.


BOO!






fly!

the end.


time to clean you screen.

i am just happy to see a long time no see friend...
its just so simple.

and i just fell sick.

the reason for me being happpy

yawn. i am really sleepy.
but i am so damn happy.
i am happy cos i stayed out late last night.
i stayed out late last night for supper.
i when for supper because...


yeah. met jeremy and wei kiat fot supper. "looks nice"


and not forgetting may!

had supper at chomp chomp around 12 plus.
and den headed for seletar dam.


a rather nice place, but had lots of ants.


he drives a mitshibushi lancer


yeah. we noe this cars belongs to he and his bro. obvious huh.

its tiring but worth while.

i am seriously over it and getting on with life. i am happy justbeing able to meet friends.
serious.


remember those haversack days? sec sch is always fun. reminising the past...


the time when you can sit down and have a moment with yourself.

talk. / fat

met with old friends.
talk quite a lot.
reminise the past. talk about the future.
topics seem to be endless.

and

I AM GETTING FAT! GOSH! its 53 going 54!

no. 8 deadly sin

according to the early christian teachings, there are 7 deadly sin that man has the tendency to fall for.

1. Lust (excessive sexual appetites)
2. Gluttony (over-indulgence)
3. Greed (avarice)
4. Sloth (idleness)
5. Wrath (anger)
6. Envy (jealousy)
7. Pride (vanity)

my own number 8 deadly sin would be COMPLACENT.
its deadly and can led to your fall - failure.

ps: HI SIM, bye NUS

i want

that new urban male "miss naughty" tank top

that new hair cut

that new shoes from mondo

new clothes...

i am ok!

the doctor say i am ok!
there is nothing wrong with my weight
so stop telling me i look skinny.
i am ok! i am healthy!